For Adult Survivors

We are an organization working towards preventing Child Sexual Abuse and providing therapeutic support to survivors and supporting their healing journey.

We understand that you may be wondering how and where to start. You may be feeling lost and worried. But, you’ve already taken the first step to healing by looking for organizations working on the issue.  It must have been difficult and you have been strong enough to have initiated this journey to recovery.

Healing is possible. It occurs in small, steady steps taken one after another. So be patient with yourself and take it at your pace.

Please do remember:

  • The abuse is not your fault
  • You are not alone
  • Fear and anger as reactions to abuse are protective feelings and are normal
  • Many people don’t tell anybody for many years
  • All of us are unique and our situations are varied. There is no one reaction or way to deal with abuse. There is no one way to heal. Both reaction to abuse and healing from it are unique, personal and individual
  • Most perpetrators of sexual abuse are known to their victims
  • You did not ask for the abuse and you don’t deserve it
  • Your safety comes first
  • You are not alone and there is support available
  • There is HOPE!!

Self-Care

Breaking a silence that has been buried deep for many years isn’t easy. The first step in dealing with the abuse can start with you. Start with a self-care routine. Self-care means looking after yourself and treating yourself as a person who deserves care.

  • Take care of your body. Do something physical. Learn to dance, or join a club of joggers. Exercise is a great way to burn off excess emotion, and it teaches us to be more comfortable in our bodies
  • Find out activities that soothe you and encourage you to enjoy the present moment. Take a long, hot bath; listen to music, or watch old movies. It can be anything that soothes you and does not cause you or other any harm.
  • Find a creative outlet. You might want to write a poem or draw something. It doesn’t have to be anything perfect. All creations are beautiful.
  • Try and understand your trigger. A trigger can come from seeing a person who looks like your abuser or even the smell of the perfume he used. In those moments, try to find a safe space to sit down and release your emotions. It’s OK to walk away from a situation or conversation that feels triggering.
  • Know and communicate your feelings and boundaries. Understand what makes you anxious, worried, angry or scared. It is OK to say No to any situation or touch that makes you uncomfortable. Even if the person asking you is a close one.
  • Have an emergency self-care plan. Having a strategy in place, for times when you have an anxiety attack or you feel overwhelmed can help you take the steps you need. Whether it is meditation, deep breathing, going for a walk, or talking to a friend.
  • Start therapy. Therapy is often the most effective route to overcome emotional and behavioural concerns that keep you from living the life you want.

Understanding Therapy and Counselling

  • Counselling and Therapy are professional activities that utilise an interpersonal relationship to enable people to develop self-understanding and to make changes in their lives. It is neither friendship nor advice giving.
  • Counselling and Therapy are based on an ethos of respect for clients, their values, their beliefs, their uniqueness and their rights.
  • Make therapy a personal choice. Rather than it being forced.
  • Therapies and Therapists differ. Just because some people found one type of therapy or therapist great, it doesn’t mean it’ll work for you. You don’t need to impress the therapist. Be honest with your inhibitions.
  • Don’t rush the process. In therapy often slow is fast.
  • Things can get worse before they get better. Talking about, and learning from one’s own life and adverse childhood experiences can be a difficult process. Sticking with the process is important.
  • Therapy is just not about sharing your experience of abuse. You can decide when and how to talk about it or whether to talk about it at all or not. Therapy tends to go at a pace set by you – the client.
  • The relationship between the client and therapist is based on trust and confidentiality

In case you want to initiate therapy or know more about counselling and therapy please write to us at be confidential and will only be read by a therapist. You can also call us at our counselling support number:  +91 98 1908 6444

Here is some literature from Arpan which you can read to understand more about Child Sexual Abuse and impact of therapy:

Some important links on therapy and self-help guides from other organisations are:

http://www.sarsas.org.uk/self-help-guides/

http://www.nsvrc.org/sites/default/files/nsvrc_publications_resource-list_online-resources-for-survivors.pdf

https://www.rainn.org/after-sexual-assault