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Times of India - Navi Mumbai Plus
20th
September, 2007
Learn to say no
Workshop conducted on how to
empower children and parents to deal with sexual abuse
J V R Gopal
The Rotary Club of Navi Mumbai (RCNM) recently
conducted a workshop on Personal Safety of the Child at Rotary Centre,
Vashi. A number of school teachers and parents from Navi Mumbai attended
the event. Recently, the ministry of Women and Child Development released
its first-ever National Study on Child Abuse in April, which revealed the
stark reality that every second boy or girl faces sexual abuse in one or
more forms at some point in his/her lives.
“It is a very scary scenario that every child is vulnerable to abuse, be
it physical, verbal, emotional or sexual. Hence, we thought it appropriate
to organise a workshop by NGO Arpan. The main focus of Arpan, which was
founded by Pooja Taparia, is on spreading awareness on Child Sexual Abuse
(CSA). Arpan also provides professional help in dealing with all stages of
support for victims of child abuse,” explained Surekha Mhatre, president,
RCNM, in her welcome address.
Child Sexual Abuse (CSA) is defined as any sexual act directed at a minor.
“It could be a sexual touch or fondle, sexually explicit talk or hint,
exposure to sexual activity or pornography and finally rape or attempted
rape,” said Pushpa Venkatraman, counsellor, Arpan, who conducted the
workshop. In fact, according to the national study, 50 percent of sexual
offenders were known to the victim or were in positions of trust, such as
a family member, close relative, friend or neighbour.
“The study revealed that children in the age group of five to 12 years
faced higher levels of abuse. What’s more, boys were equally at risk as
girls. Sadly, most children suffer quietly. They don’t talk about the
abuse. But we need to talk about it so that we can prevent and cure it,”
explained Venkatraman.
CSA affects the child negatively, thereby causing many ill effects. “They
include shame guilt and anger; fear shock and confusion; constant
illnesses; future exploitative relationships; social with drawl and
finally inappropriate sexualised behaviour,” added the counsellor.
The thrust of the workshop therefore was to create awareness about such
behavioral changes in children among their parents.
“It is only then that CSA can be prevented. Recognising such an abusive
situation is a skill that both parents and children must master. It can
help them stay away from such situations. Understanding the concept of
Safe Touch (ST) and Unsafe Touch (UT) is the first building block in
overcome the menace”, explained Pushpa.
So just like a parent teaches the child traffic safety rules, they should
similarly teach children about ST and UT, as well as the methods to take
care of them.
“The child should be thus empowered to say ‘no’ to any action or touch
that causes discomfort or unease to him or her. Parents, who are aware,
can help a sexually abused child much better,” advocated Venkatraman. “It
is of utmost importance to remember and remind the child that sexual abuse
is not his/ her fault. Children will talk about sexual abuse only in an
understanding and comfortable environment.”
Arpan’s road map for parents to help victims of abuse is by first
recognising that child has been sexually abused.
“Then the child should be helped to talk about this experience. Finally,
professional support should be sought help to heal the child”, advised
Pushpa.
The victim should be helped to move on and live beyond the shadow of the
trauma of sexual abuse with dignity.
“The child has the right to do so. If the intervention is not undertaken
within two years of abuse, the suppressed memory is bound to play havoc in
the latter parts of life,” she concluded.
One of the delegates, Kavita Nair Bhatia, said, “I am associated with an
NGO. I attended the seminar in order to understand the identification
part, as well as the right time for intervention”.
NOTE FOR CHILDREN
No older or bigger person can ask the child to touch their private parts.
If this happens, the child feels confused. Thus, he/she should say ‘no’
and get away. Most important of all, the child should tell a trusted adult
and keep telling until they get the help they need
NOTE FOR PARENTS
Give information to your child in an appropriate manner and in conformity
with their age. The key lies in understanding the problem before they can
prevent CSA.
Aware parents and children can help
prevent child sexual abuse by
• Teaching the child the difference between safe touch and unsafe touch
early
• Empowering the child to say ‘no’ to an unsafe touch |